"Wanna play a game?"
|Title(s)||Wunderkind of Black Hole|
|Relatives||None (in the multiverse)|
Lash is a Commanding Officer featured in Advance Wars 2: Black Hole Rising and Advance Wars: Dual Strike as one of the main antagonists. At first purely an adversary for the Allied Nations to overcome, Lash lends her expertise when she joins with the Allied Nations against the Bolt Guard. Specializing in using terrain to devastating effect, Lash's units tend to be very jack-of-all-trades on open fields or straight fights. In a forest, city, or mountainous terrain, however, they become frighteningly powerful. Lash's CO Power and Super CO power amplify this specialization immensely, allowing units to ignore movement penalties caused by - and double the benefits of - terrain.
Prior to Black Hole Rising, Commander Sturm recruited Lash as a CO in the Black Hole army along with Flak, Adder, and Hawke. By and large, each CO was assigned their own continent to subjugate when the Black Hole Rising story began: Flak raided Orange Star, Adder laid siege upon Yellow Comet, and Hawke demolished all Green Earth resistance. Lash was assigned to Blue Moon, although, like the other COs, she made appearances on the other continents of War World. In particular, Lash's presence in a mission meant the introduction of a new technology during the Orange Star portion of the campaign.
In Blue Moon, Lash made a number of messes that Olaf still will never forgive her for making. In particular, the Black Hole Wunderkind turned Olaf’s hometown into a spectacle of bedlam during the Toybox mission. Without a thought, this sleepy town was turned into a live combat zone that Lash used to field test her latest experiments and designs. Olaf was, suffice to say, utterly furious, but ultimately won the day over her. On another mission, Nature Walk, Grit was charged with navigating through a winding route past three of Lash’s devastating Cannons to save the Blue Moon HQ. Though victorious, it was still very close.
In Yellow Comet, Lash was caught playing in an expansive mountain range by the intel CO, Sonja. Despite her defeat all but assured, the Black Hole Wunderkind challenged Sonja to a game: if even one of her units got to the Yellow Comet HQ, Lash won. Sonja, having both sides of the range peppered with artillery units and a small defensive battalion around the HQ, agreed to the contest and a battle of wits ensued. Though Lash ultimately lost, she didn’t hesitate to point out how similar they were and left a shaken Sonja behind as Lash retreated. Lastly, Lash was responsible for the creation of the missile launch facility Sturm nearly used to obliterate Cosmoland.
In Dual Strike, Lash resumes her work as a scientifically-enthused CO with absolutely all the toys. These toys, such as Black Bombs and the Black Onyx, made her an unbelievable pain to defeat. However, Von Bolt up and decided to execute Hawke for the heinous crimes of seeing him eavesdropping after Kindle suggested a backstab plan not moments before. Hawke fled when this execution order was backed by Oozium 238s and strongly urged Lash to follow. She complied, but the pair would’ve been food if not for the timely assistance of the Allied Nations saving them. Lash’s role beyond this point is left to the player’s discretion, as CO selection is free for them to choose. If they so choose, however, Lash can take part in every single mission thereafter leading up to and even including Von Bolt’s destruction.
With the Allied Nations disbanded, Lash was left with very little to do. This naturally resulted in a default to experimentation. After much pleading with the various War World nations, Lash secured a remote, mountainous region in Yellow Comet with a very, very low population count and was strictly monitored in exchange for having a new Toybox. It was around this time Lash began developing a literal Black Hole tank. The results were both highly unexpected and perhaps understandable: the tank fired a Black Hole round that ended up sucking Lash through into the multiverse.
Lash's entrance into the multiverse by way of black hole transmission sent her straight to the Sea of Moondust. While she did suffer some mental trauma from banging her head a number of times against her own tank, meeting some turtles, a witch, and a gambling man made the entire encounter pure Lunacy!
After this encounter, Lash attempted some scouting and salvaging operations in the multiverse that resulted in quite Black Skies.
This prompted Lash to conduct a field test of her men and equipment in the form of a live-fire exercise. This little bout of Stretching with an implacable Commander has left them with an interesting arrangement, Rose promising Lash an omni-tool in exchange for working aboard the Normandy. How well this can end is anyone's guess, but it will certainly be interesting.
When the Multiverse's Christmas season began in earnest, Lash caused a bit of Market Madness by robbing a store and escaping the pursuit of authorities. While she did not learn the true meaning of Christmas, at least there will be no coal stockings or excess kindle for the yule. Meeting Santa was another pleasant surprise for the Wunderkind.
While exploring on another salvage mission, Lash threw a tantrum and separated from Decoy Squad in Holodrum. While perhaps not the wisest course of action, there isn't much harm in playing Board Games.
What could have been a routine trip to a Do-It-Yourself hardware store instead turned into a chance encounter with an odd miniturized moon and its trainer, but that's just another day in the multiverse.
Powers and CapabilitiesEdit
Lash has two notable talents, both of which involve her special blend of chaotic genius. The first of these is her skill as an inventor. It was because of Lash that a vast majority of Black Hole’s toys – ranging from laser cannons, to the garden variety cannons, Neo Tanks, and even a special Lash Armor for protecting Black Hole pipes! – even existed and made the invasion of War World possible.
The second, but most prominent, of Lash’s skills are as a Commanding Officer. Despite seeming like a child playing with toys while engaging enemies, Lash’s unconventional and wildly unpredictable tactics have just enough underlying strategic sense to work perfectly. Combine this with a bit of obfuscating crazy and Lash is far more dangerous than apparent in battle. Units under her command gain offensive bonuses based on and equal to the defensive benefits of terrain they occupy.
As a CO, Lash does not engage units personally. It can be inferred that she possesses combat experience and training typical of armed forces officers, but this has yet to demonstrated in any meaningful way. Still, a death trap wouldn’t be out of the question.
As far as weaknesses are concerned, Lash is human both physically and mentally. On top of this is her relatively minimal capacity for self-defense outside of any units or inventions at her disposal.
As a CO, Lash would – and, on at least one occasion, outright did – throw away a large portion of her units on a bet dressed up as a game. While not stupid in any sense, the wunderkind has a tendency to do things that, even by her standards, aren’t terribly wise or just meaninglessly throwing lives away if they would provide enough amusement. Arguably one of her few CO-related flaws, anyone fighting her should take advantage of it post-haste.
Emotionally, Lash’s social underdevelopment and juvenile nature make even genuine attempts to get along carry an outlandish undercurrent. Units under her command likely feel concern for both her acumen and their lives, no matter how skilled of a CO Lash might be. When things aren’t going to plan and/or aren’t fun any more, the wunderkind gets very angry and/or upset and her judgment is impaired accordingly.
FollowersEditMech Squad "Decoy"
A well-trained squad of five seemingly-faceless troops in large biohazard suits, one of which acknowledges and communicates Lash's orders. Specifically, Decoy Squad consists of the aforementioned Communications Officer, the Sniper, the Spotter, the Explosives Expert, and the Mechanic.
Decoy Squad is Lash's first and, as of her entrance into the Multiverse, last line of defense. As Lash largely cannot fight on her own, this Mech squad is forced to be the best security defense force at their CO's disposal. The Communications Officer is regarded as leader of Decoy Squad. Beyond organizing and relaying Lash's orders on the field, he serves as Lash's primary counterweight and substitute parental figure. A loss of him would send the entire squad and Lash herself into disarray.APC Unit Shepherd
While ordinarily APC units serve as logistics bridges for bigger and better units or troop transport, Shepherd is a bit... different. The pilot is of questionable mental status, infamous for charging headlong into entire enemy infantry divisions while screaming battle cries on the radio. While most everybody in Black Hole would believe such a bloodthirsty driver would die shortly after reassignment to Lash's division, he seems to have flourished there instead. In appearance, Shepherd resembles any other rank-and-file Black Hole soldier.
Shepherd has played a vital role in Lash's Market Incident by both keeping her on task and supplying his APC for the raid. While the vehicle was extensively damaged, Shepherd regards the mission fondly.Black Bombs
One of Lash's pride and joys, the Black Bomb is a comically explosive and blunt instrument just slightly less dangerous than their creator. The blast from even one of these bombs can and has obliterated the notion of an offensive against Lash's forces more than once. In the Multiverse, however, Black Bombs have seen little use... for the moment.
- "What's an FBI? Is it code for Funny Bubbleparty Inviter? Forgetful Blabbering Idiot? Feisty Bathtub Inventor? Favorite Battleship Igniter? Ooh, I bet you're that one!"
- "Release the radioactive handle birds THAT CAN SMELL FEAR!"
- "At least I won, loser! LOSER LOSER LOSER! Nyeh-nyeh!"
- "Come on, let's play!"
- “There’s a difference between crazy and wrong.”
- "It's better to get familiar with the lab now than after you wake up strapped to a table. Just a suggestion."
- "We were following traditional protocol: suppress hostilities above all else."
- "It is military policy that we not be so uniquely identified. Commanders may become too invested in their soldiers to complete their orders."
APC Unit Shepherd
- "ROLLING THUNDER!"
- "Nothing can stop us!"
- “Those were battle plans, mate. She wants to fight.”
- Lash has named and personalized every single Black Bomb she has ever made despite them being one-off tools of overwhelmingly destructive power. The most famous of these Black Bombs, Doctor Boomington, had its scraps reforged into part of a teddy bear Lash carries around.
- One of the little-known facts about Decoy Squad is that, contrary to their name, they are the longest lasting collection of infantry under Lash's command. Reasons for this include specialized gear, personalized armor and weapons, incredible skill, and, of course, dumb luck.
- It is entirely unknown how APC Unit Shepherd got his name. One could speculate, however, that his bloodthirsty charges spark other forces to follow - or run screaming from - his direction.